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“Unveiling Harmony: The Dance of Role Reversal in Matrimony” Part 1


When I uttered “I do,” I envisioned a life filled with giggles and lolly pops. Little did I anticipate that I would embrace a life that seemed to cast aside my womanhood. The swagger that once had me shining and thriving morphed into days clad in casual rags, sweatpants, and headscarves,


I once believed that fairy tales were my destiny, that as a woman of elegance and allure, joyous finales were written in the stars for me. How curious to find myself in a role contrary to my nature—assuming the mantle typically held by men.


Yet here I am, tender and delicate at heart, navigating this unexpected path with the grace of a lady, albeit in a guise unanticipated.


Once a shy child, I yearned for a place in the world, a community where I belonged. Throughout my life, I faced rejection, yet my heart’s desire was simple: to be loved for who I am. I would never have imagined that I would take on a role so different from what I was created to be.


In the traditional narrative, it’s often said that a man is the breadwinner, the disciplinarian, the caretaker, the guardian. Yet, here I am, harboring a fear of returning to my home, where I shoulder the financial burdens and nurture children I’ve never borne. It’s a curious twist of fate that has me questioning the very roles we’re taught to expect.


The irony that clashed with my happiness was stark. I stole moments under the sun, as my keeper deemed it necessary to confine me indoors, while he roamed free, He was insecure and jealous, he knew he had a diamond that was outshining him yet I allowed it not thinking being strong was overrated that soon I would break.


Yet, it’s not to say I was completely shackled; I could venture out to earn a living, for who else would tend to the children’s needs while he pursued his plight in the Devil’s playground? Doing who knows what with who knows who?


It’s incredible how I became desensitized to the relentless criticisms and letdowns, finding myself in a desolate state, devoid of companionship. I convinced myself that this was my existence. This perspective lingered for what seemed like an everlasting period, until a single day arrived where I reached my breaking point, unable to bear it any longer.


The earner and the nurturer of children who didn’t share my bloodline, all while dwelling in shadows. Despite being the one footing the bills to keep the lights on, I shed tears that seemed alien to my naturally kind and untroubled spirit. I reflected on these realities, I realized it was time to release the grip of a world where I constantly felt like an outsider. 


Amidst the peaceful evening, with the children lost in slumber, and the quietness blanketing the house, I confronted him, tears welling in my eyes. Though my voice remained firm, a glimmer of sorrow flickered in my eyes, reflecting the weight of tortured years.

I unveiled the years of unspoken suffering, the sacrifices unseen, the dreams forsaken for a shimmering mirage of love, my heart soaring with newfound liberation. With a heavy heart, I whispered my resolution, desperate to break free from the penumbra of his existence.


I looked into his eyes, my days of darkness finally behind me. “I deserve more,” I declared, my voice filled with determination. No longer would I settle for being an afterthought, someone easily dismissed after sacrificing my entire life. I had imagined becoming a wife, a bride adorning the mantel, but instead, I found myself transformed into a ragged, worn-out, haggardly shell of a woman.


“No one would ever want a loser like you,” he sneered. The words hit me like a punch to the gut, leaving a lingering taste of bitterness in the air. The room had suddenly grown colder, and my heart sank to the pits of my stomach. The weight of his criticism made me question my ability as a woman. I wondered if this was the reason I was treated like a man.


Keep pushing forward on your journey to discover your creative identity!

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7 Comments


ZOLALAMB
ZOLALAMB
Jul 03

I have been in this role before, I have been in many situations where I took the place as a man. There was an image of a man playing video games lying in bed and their wife was heading to work with a suit and briefcase on. That is when I finally realize that picture did not go together.

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Sometimes we are to quick to say I do when we really don't. We see the red flags and think we could change the colore, but that is rarely a reality.

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JOURNEY B
JOURNEY B
Jun 25

One thing we as women need to do is to look for the red flags of an pretender, abusers and those who lack empathy. I really enjoyed this although it triggered me in some aspects.

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This is an amazing read! Yet, this is often the effect of unhealed wounds. Often when we carry rejection and trauma from childhood it manifests in our relationships and in every area of our lives. We desperately desire acceptance for who we are, yet if we do not accept ourselves, no one else will either. If we don't value ourselves, same holds true.

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Absolutely! Recognizing our worth is a shield against those who might exploit our kindness. When we value ourselves, we set healthy boundaries and empower ourselves to navigate relationships with wisdom and self-respect.

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WOW, after trying to leave an emotional and financially looser he wanted to gaslight you to keep you enslaved. Great Read

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If someone makes you feel crazy or wrong for your own thoughts and emotions, they may exhibit narcissistic tendencies.

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